Monica @ Allure (eventually) - Birth of the Spith

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He waits for Death… but Death does not come.

Indeed, something else happens. He is resurrected from the brink by the forces of EVIL… a mechanical heart to replace the natural one, torn asunder by those whom he treasured the most… a mechanical liver to clean the blood, now that Al Cohol and his minions (ALL those Walkers are named “Johnnie”, you say?) have done a serious number on the original tissue….

Gone is “the bunny”. He is now half rabbit, half machine, but all EVIL. He is the bane of the Galaxy’s carrot patches and massage tables of the Greater Toronto Area.

He is… Darth Vermin; really, really EVIL Lord of the Spith.




Right… so, now that I’m “different” and all, I figure – what the heck. I’ll go let the Seraphim know that it’s OK to love me. After all, I’m EVIL now, and I’ll be a huge PRICK (note I said “be”… unfortunately, THAT wasn’t upgraded in the “makeover”...) to them, and I’ll treat them poorly, and I wear BLACK. Evil IS cool.

My first stop is to inform that girl at SRM. I sweep in there majestically, only to be unceremoniously stopped by a young lady behind the counter (she was attractive, and had both light and dark hair – a confusing message to those of us who see everything in black and white). As I begin to explain to her the purpose of my gracing their establishment, but she seems to have an agenda of her own, as could be seen in the exchange:

DV: “I a…”
Girl: “Do you have an appointment?”


DV: “No, I a…”
Girl: “We don’t have anyone until 10:00”


DV: “Really, I j…”
Girl (turning monitor): “Here is who is in at 10:00”

DV: “Is Joy here? Joy can fi…”
Girl (looking annoyed): “HERE is who is in at 10:00”


Even Lords of the Spith know when they aren’t going to win. So with a flick of the cape, I turn paws and move on to stop two – The Allure system – to inform a girl THERE.

The entrance to Allure was… well, less than Majestic. I’m locked out, and despite all of my magnificent EVIL powers… I’m reduced to “ringing the doorbell”. Hmmph.

The door is answered by a very attractive young blonde woman (Monica), who lets me in, and then immediately returns to the lounge area. A young brunette comes to the counter, and before I can get caught in the trap, I make my intentions clearly known…

DV: “I require Robi…”
Girl: “Robin isn’t working tonight”.
DV: “Really?”
Girl: “Really.”
DV: “For all the rotten lu… I mean – I KNEW that. I am Lord of the Spith.”
Girl: “I’m sure you are, honey. You can see Monica or Leah or…”.

As it turns out, the second “or” decided that she wasn’t available after all, subsequent to peeking around the corner to see me (we EVIL Lords have that effect on some, I’m afraid). Moreover, I am now talked into a session – something that wasn’t planned. Both ladies were attractive, and both were completely unknown to The Dark Side… but since Leah was nearly fully booked, and Monica’s itinerary was wide open, I chose to inflict my EVIL on Monica. I give counter-girl currency, and am walked back to the room.

After showering, I am clean, but not entirely “presentable”. This is because a session was not envisioned for the evening. Well, that and Spith Lords pay little attention to their beard growth. Call it a “Privilege of EVIL”.

Upon entering, Monica was quite the opposite. Medium height, blonde hair (tied up), curvy womanly body, showing better shaving etiquette than myself, she is quite attractive. Our “greeting” is good and cold… no niceties offered, nor were any required. Yes, she recognises the depth of the EVIL in the room, and she is entranced by it. YOU are MINE. Ha ha ha ha ha!

*THUMP-wheeze-THUMP-wheeeeeze-THUMP*

She comes in, and suggests I get comfortable. I agree to take off the mask, but the cape stays (because nothing says “cool” like a black cape), and if she gets oil on it, there will be EVIL to pay!

From there, conversation is sparse, but that is to be expected. The massage itself was… really, quite good. Very, very good, actually. Probably the best part of the session – and that, I find, is unusual (Spith Lords aren’t crazy about being touched by strangers).

Too soon, she asks if I would like to massage her. Being EVIL, I ask her if that’s what SHE would like… and when she says yes, I decide to do it – only, I’m going to do it poorly, so as to be EVIL.

So I massage her backside for a while. And a while longer. And longer. And longer. And, to be honest, I’d gotten more than a little bored of rubbing her bottom. I’m trying to use my EVIL mind control powers, saying “you will GET UP”… “YOU WILL GET UP”… but she must have been one of those flying Mexican aardvark thingies that are immune to my EVIL mind manipulation (in disguise, of course, because she looks much better than the flying Mexican aardvark thingies...).
 
She does eventually get up, and we move to the conclusion of the session. While not disagreeable, and more than sufficiently eager to please, it was not particularly noteworthy either. Well, I shouldn’t say that – there was ONE noteworthy aspect… she called “time” on me. ME. Darth Vermin, EVIL Lord and harbinger of DOOM, was given the 30-second clock. Gutsy. That said, she did manage to “land the shuttle” in time, so to speak, and was pleasant during the retreat phase.

Looking back, it would have been nice to be offered even the slightest gesture of affection, real or otherwise. Not that Dark Lords need this or anything… but it would have at least given me the chance to be really EVIL and reject said gestures.


Monica is a very pretty, pleasant girl – however, she is nowhere near Seraphim attributes or quality. I’m sure she will be quite pleased to know Lord Vermin will not bother her again.



As an aside, I’m not sure if it’s on account of Monica… or on account of the new EVIL thing… or on account of me having been away from it for some time… but I think I recall “hobbying” used to be more fun than this…. Sure seemed like it, anyways.


*Wheeze-wheeeeeze-wheeeeeezzzzze*
 
Lord Vermin,

I want to become evil as well. Actually a black cape is all I really want to cover my big white ass.

Fuzzy even though the experience was soso the review was excellent.
 
Happens to me quite regularly at Allure ... sometimes I walk in on the spur of the moment hoping that a fav would somehow be available. However, when they are not, I almost always end up staying with someone else even though that wasn't my intention.

The Allure management couldn't have chosen a better name for this spa ... Definition: The power to attract or entice. And that's exactly what they do.

Darth Vermin, you are truly evil !!! I guess the days of speaking romantic catch-phrases such as "I don
 
A fun filled reading experiance,Lord.

Too bad you didn't have a good time with Monica who is #1 in my TDL right now mostly becuase of her curvy pictures they have put on their website.
 
An Excellent Review !!!

All I have to say is that you have to take the good with the bad, or Evil, and always remember that ...

SPITH HAPPENS !!!

VBB
 
Lord Thumper, I too have encountered the droid receptionist at SRM (not Felicia, not Joy, not Anita, all of whom are sweethearts)
 
Fuzzy...um I mean Bad Guy with the emphasima.....I wish you hit the occasional SC and wrote about it.
Very funny, a little geeky..but funny!
 
Fuzzy!

Nice one! As usual.

However, after reading the above quote, I had to run down to the bar and drink some Johnny Walker BLACK LABEL. BWaaaahhhhaaaaaaa~!!!

I feel better now...

AC
 
Fuzzy Thumper.......a great review....very entertaining......I think that you were too Evil for Leah !
 
"You have to feel sorry for those people who don't drink.
When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day." - Frank Sinatra
__________________
"Alcohol is the cause of and solution to all of life's problems"- Homer J. Simpson


Don't forget this one : God Created alcohol to keep the Irish from
taking over the world
 
FT,

Nice review, I've always enjoyed your use of a script like format and sound effects.

I found your closing statement to be most interesting, that it used to be more fun. I've found myself feeling the same thing for quite some time.

What about when you see you're all time active favs? Still a thrill?
 
Brings to mind a famous quote out of a song from years ago:

Mere alcohol,
Doesn't thrill me at all...


Weed,
Yep!

Here's another one:

(For the ladies) God created alcohol so that ugly men would get laid.
(For the gents) God created alcohol so that ugly women would get laid.

Bottoms up!

Al Cohol
 
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    WEDNESDAY at 𝗔𝗟𝗜𝗖𝗘 𝗦𝗣𝗔 416-298-0898, 4915 Steeles Ave. E, Scarborough 3very nice girls here today. Open 10am to 9pm: KITTY : is a new Korean girl, super busty, small body, new to the business. Very friendly, no rush, dfk, bbbj, cim, cof, rim, titf*k, all services that u like! LUCY: is a young & busty Taiwanese cutie with natural D Cups, slightly curvy round ass
  43. HollywoodSpa:
    Wednesday at 🎭𝗛𝗢𝗟𝗟𝗬𝗪𝗢𝗢𝗗 𝗦𝗣𝗔🎭, 4578 Yonge St, Unit 100, North York, ON: NICOLE & SISI. ☎𝟰𝟭𝟲-𝟮𝟮𝟮-𝟱𝟱𝟱𝟰☎ When you visit 🎭Hollywood Spa🎭, you will be treated with tender care and your visit will be a fulfilling one. Nice Massage, Young Pretty Girls. We have Chinese, Japanese, Korean & other attendants. NICOLE is petite, slim and very pretty, with C Cups , long hair & a slim waist. She has nice massage and great services.
  44. ForeverWarden:
    Wednesday at 🫦❤️🔴🟥♾️𝓕𝓞𝓡𝓔𝓥𝓔𝓡 𝓢𝓟𝓐♾️🟥🔴❤️🫦2190 Warden Ave, Unit 201, Scarborough 𝟰𝟭𝟲-𝟴𝟬𝟬-𝟳𝟴𝟴𝟳: Bella, Cindy & Sasa. Bella is around 5’3” with a thin to medium build, C Cups, and a pleasing personality. She can offer dfk, bbbj and cfs as well as a good massage experience. Cindy is a slim beauty, 5’4”, natural C Cups & wonderfully long nipples. Her massage is nice, her bbbj will drive you wild
  45. HolidaySpa:
    Wednesday at 🌴😎🌅𝓗𝓸𝓵𝓲𝓭𝓪𝔂 𝓢𝓹𝓪🌅😎🌴3517 Kennedy Rd, Unit 4, Scarborough ☎️𝟰𝟯𝟳-𝟮𝟰𝟳-𝟭𝟭𝟵𝟵☎️: EMILY, KIKI & CINDY. EMILY is a VERY tiny petite SPINNER superstar of the highest quality. Emily has a pretty face, natural A Cups, slim waist, and a lovely spinner bottom, topped off with the very best of services. Kiki is very attractive, young, about 5’4” and 110 Lbs., slim with a banging body.
  46. SugarLoveSpa:
    Wednesday at ❤️💙 💜⎝𝗦𝗨𝗚𝗔𝗥 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 𝗦𝗣𝗔⎠💖💗💘: ELLA, SUSAN & TIFFANY. 1270 Finch Ave W (at Keele St), Unit 18. North York, ON ☎ 𝟰𝟯𝟳-𝟯𝟲𝟱-𝟮𝟲𝟴𝟴 ☎ ELLA is a lovely Thai sweetheart, 5’1” with C Cups, smooth skin and a very pleasing attitude. SUSAN is a small, slim & sexy black girl, only 53 Kgs, with nice boobs and ass, very versatile services. TIFFANY is an amazing slim petite doll
  47. Moneylee:
    All season wellness center : Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament big boobs Sophia ,young girl pretty face nice figure Thai deep massage Helen,Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament summer ,Young girl Big breasted saucy naughty Ella , Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Sherry ,address: #5-30 Rambler dr Brampton ,Ontario L6W 1E2☎️4376655510 🦵🦵👅👅👄👄🈵🈵
  48. Moneylee:
    Full season wellness center: New Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament big boobs Sasa ,Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament big boobs Ella ,Young girl Big-breasted big big butts Aris ,Young beautiful face sexy body and good deep massage maggie,Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Mary. 🏠 2560 Shepard ave Mississauga unit 1 ☎️ 4379857899 🦵🦵👄👄👅👅🈵🈵
  49. Endless Joy Spa:
    ✨✨✨✨✨[GRAND OPENING]✨✨✨✨✨ 💞Endless Joy Spa💞 🎇 (155 East Beaver Creek Rd Unit #8, Richmond Hill) 416-731-8565🎇10am-2am, New First Day Young Sexy Curvy Chinese Sasa, Slim Petite Chinese Vivi & Young Slim Sexy Chinese Faye
  50. bnwellness_wilson:
    We have 3 girls are working today, New ,young pretty Lily23’s 💕slim Curved body shap big boobs Mia 💕and sexy Ella are providing deep tissue massage, pls call 416-3985777 book appointment and walk in always welcome, back entrance and parking available. 350 Wilson Ave North York
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