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feeling so low

Penny Odel

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hi, i have had 2 disc ops so far L4/L5 and L4/S1 after the last op approx 10 months ago i fell over because my foot is numb from op 1 and does not always go in the correct direction anyway i fell on to my left shoulder and now have a shoulder imingement oh boy is this painful i also have flashes of numbness down my left leg and unbelievable pain in my left toes ,i have also had sciatica down my right leg which is now getting unbearable, thankfully iam seeing my consultant this week , iam hoping i do not need another op but feel like i do need at least 2 not to mention the surgery iam waiting for on my shoulder, i was taking oromorph but was so low i thought i was going to commit suicide but the gp did nothing and let me walk out crying saying i was going to kill myself, i thought its either help myself or just end it luckily i decided to stop the oromorph and obviously i have more pain but my state of my mind is slightly better, sorry for the ramble but i feel quite lonely at the moment and cannot see an end to all this pain.
 
Hi bmw1

Firstly - a big

I don't have any practical advice about your pain (sorry) but I wanted you to know that I am thinking of you and you are not alone - you've got HP now!!!

I hope your consultant has some answers - but your GP sounds crap - feeling for you - can't you go to another GP? You obviously can't go on like this & at the very least need someone sympathetic to your pain & emotional distress.

Would you like me to send you some Reiki &/or Crystal Healing?

Monica x
 
Hi BMW1

Please understand you are not alone. I too have felt very desperate at times with my back problems (I have posted quite a bit so won't bore you with details) and my GP has put me on an antidepressant which has helped so much. He also has offered counselling which I am considering at the moment. Please go and see a different Gp or if he is the only one available insist he does a depression score on you, it's like a mini questionnaire, it will determine whether you need antidepressants or not. A good GP will then monitor you and make you do the questionnaire every few months to check for improvement or worsening symptoms.

As a back pain sufferer I know how you are feeling and I agree there are times when I also would like my left leg chopped off, mainly at night when desperate for sleep and my leg won't stop jumping and twitching. I have a great husband to listen to me, but if you are alone and desperate the Samaritans are very good listeners and sometimes just getting stuff off your chest helps.

Please keep in touch with me and let me know how you are doing, take care Wend x
 
thanks for the replies, i have seen all the gp's at my practice and i have done the deppression questionaire and scored 10 on most of them but still they pass the buck saying wait till you see the specialist, i to think anti depressants would help but with all the pain killers iam taking i think they are afraid to give me anymore drugs, so its just take 1 day at a time, i go to bed at 6pm every night and watch tv there as its the only place i can get some relief from the agonising pain , i feel sorry for hubby as he also had L4/L5 done a few years ago and he also suffers from spasms in his leg, and because iam in so much pain i don't feel very sociable at the moment so we do not go out apart from shopping which is done as quick as possible then back home, some days my legs feel like jelly and i feel like its too much effort to walk, i guess thats maybe the depression.
 
I can't believe your GP is not taking your depression seriously. I don't think it's to do with the amount of tablets as I take 27 tablets a day plus oramorph every four to six hours. My consultant had nothing to do with my depression, but maybe yours will, when are you due to be seen?

I also spend a lot of time in bed, most days from 2pm on other than to come down to eat tea. Now my family come to me upstairs, many times there have been three or four of us on the bed watching a DVD. The up side I have found also is that my three children can come and have a bit of mum time on their own.

This would be my only advice, try and see the positives in a situation. I would love to go to a shop but only attend medical appointments, but this saves us a fortune on my impulse buying

Please keep in touch, it does help talking to another sufferer. Take care Wend x
 
thanks wend its nice to know iam not alone, iam seeing consultant for my back today after 10 month wait since last op ,but i know how it will go he will say we will get an mri and see whats happening , thats fair enough but that will be about a 3 month wait then if iam unlucky and need another op then it will be about another 8 months on waiting list, the thought of another year like this is almost unbearable, we have a new grandson the first but i cannot hold him for fear of dropping him because of my shoulder impingment and back pain, i think at night the nerve pain is the worst it makes you feel like chopping your toes off the pain is so bad iam on highest dose of pregablin but that does not seem to be working anymore, and have tried gabapentin but did not get on well with that one so will have to see if there is anything else he can suggest, take care helen x
 
Good luck with your appointment today. I left a message earlier on another post about the length of time all these things take. I can't believe 2 1/2 years have gone by and I am still not better. My last son goes off to uni in September and me and my hubby always said we would travel the world once they had all gone, now I struggle to travel to a docs appt. Make sure the consultant understands how desperate you are, you never know it might make a difference. I am not very good at this I hate showing emotions or getting upset so do the good old british stiff upper lip thing

Let me know how it goes. Take care Wend xxx
 
hi, i had my appointment yesterday with the consultant and as expected he is sending me for an mri scan , but he thinks my problem is scar tissue which he cannot do anything about at the moment, iam like you wend i do not like showing emotion it makes me feel weak ,but i explained how bad things were and he's writing to gp and he wants me to see pain clinic but i know there is a huge waiting list for that and i will not have the epidural that they will inevitabley recommend ( too much of a baby for that) so no further forward at moment.
 
hi i have read the entire string and really feel bad for the kind of pain you are in. having had back ache, sciatica and what nots for a very long time i can totally empathise with you.
one of the best cures i found and the reason i am upright today and functioning normally (12yrs now) is due to acupressure, it really does work miracles and is non invasive.

also get an amethyst ball and massage over the painful areas away from the body. will help with the pain and aid in tissue healing.

you can also use rhus tox mother tincture, (its homeopathic), apply a few drops on the painful spot or area and gently massage in and then keep area warm. not only will it reduce pain significantly but will also start deep tissue repair. (you may want to do a spot test before you apply to a larger area for allergy or reaction, though i find homeopathic medicines very safe).

you can also learn the pain mudras which you can to a few times a day.

if you need any more clarifications please do not hesitate to contact me.
thinking of you and sending a healing prayer for you.
love
 
Dear BMW1,

I feel for you, as I am currently suffering from a bad back incident from 3 weeks ago.. but lucky for me , after two visits to the A&E, 1 osteo app.. and 3 different GP visits ..I have found a GP that actually took the time and trouble to vet me out fully.. not only did she listen patiently to the full history before scribbling away any medication..but her examination was very detailed.. and she has now like you referred me to MRI scan soon.. I felt so hopeful with her..

She has given me Naproxen 500mg (strong painkiller) but also Lansoprazole to coat the stomach lining due to how strong Naproxen is.. then a prescription for a local analgesic cream to rub on , as well as yup you guessed it : 2mg per daily Diazepam for a week just to relax my muscles as well as to lift my spirit up a bit no doubt as I was in floods of tears with pain when I saw her..

I know different GP vary drastically.. and I don't plan on being on these medication for long ..already I am halving the tablets to regain self control and pain management.. but to me she was a God sent when i was in agony ..and unable to move!!

It took 3 useless and unempathetic to get to where i am today.. please don't lose hope..

You can also get this local analgesic cream without prescription."Algesal " . it will cost you £4.55 or there about.. get that..that's a start.. eat Turkey, ripe banana , and capsicum in your daily diet to boost your natural serotonin production..so your depression will be kept at bay..

But please please remember you do need a proper diagnosis and treatment so ..apart from the natural things you can do and try out.. keep with the doctors till you are sorted.. get someone to go with you.. if at times you lack the strength to fight your case .. also for moral support..

Good luck with it all..

With all my best wishes to your speedy recovery

Vathani X
 
Hi again
Let's hope the MRI can give you some answers. Have you had a discectomy and a fusion? I have had three epidurals and I have to say I found them to be only mildly uncomfortable, no worse than having a blood test, and much better than dentist injections. We all have different pain thresholds and to my mind when you have learnt to deal with back pain for a long time anything else is a breeze. I attend the pain clinic and the idea is to try and help you learn to live with your pain not get rid of it. This is done by keeping a diary to start with to see if there are any triggers, in my case just getting up more or less does it . They will then teach you coping techniques ie distraction, relaxation, deep breathing etc. For me the best thing they have helped with is on getting me the correct aids for my house, which I didn't know I could get free. My wait to see them was 3 1/2 months, so know about the wait very frustrating.

Keep in touch on how the MRI goes. Hope you are feeling a little better mood wise, but as my GP said Friday it is a huge adjustment coping with the disabilities our backs can cause and we are allowed to have days when all we do is cry. I am now taking up his offer of counselling so will let you know if helpful.

Take care Wend x
 
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    Blue Nile Wellness Center, We have 4 young beautiful girls are working today, young sweet student Mia and young cute open mind Ivy with curve body, pretty GFE Lina 34DD and sexy Coco are providing deep tissue and sensual massage, pls call 416-3985777 book appointment and walk in always welcome, back entrance and parking available,350 Wilson Ave North York
  40. Moneylee:
    All season wellness center : Young girl Big-breasted big Big boobs big butts Cindy , Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament big boobs Sara,Student big boobs buttocks Vicky, Enchanting sexy petite deep massageSherry ,🏠 address: #5-30 Rambler dr Brampton ,Ontario L6W 1E2☎️4376655510 🦵🦵👄👄🈵🈵👅👅
  41. Moneylee:
    full season wellness center: NewYoung girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament Mimi , Young girl big boobs beautiful face deep massage Bobo ,Young beautiful face sexy body and good deep massage star ,Young girl Big breasted saucy naughty Ella,Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Mary. 🏠 2560 Shepard ave Mississauga unit 1 ☎️ 4379857899 👄👄🦵🦵🈵🈵👅👅
  42. Dreaminn:
    TUESDAY at 💭DREAM INN WELLNESS SPA💭: EVELYN, FIONA & LULU. 10225 Yonge St (North of Major Mackenzie), Richmond Hill, ON ☎️ 647-829-2983 ☎️ EVELYN is💫A True Spinner!💫 with a beautiful face and tiny tiny body. A rare gem, 5’1” & only 95 pounds! She will rock your spinner lover’s world with her gfe services. FIONA is a slim, very beautiful and accommodating Chinese lady
  43. Endless Joy Spa:
    ✨✨✨✨✨[GRAND OPENING]✨✨✨✨✨ 💞Endless Joy Spa💞 🎇 (155 East Beaver Creek Rd Unit #8, Richmond Hill) 416-731-8565🎇Slim Sexy Chinese Kiki, Slim Petite Chinese Suki, Tall Slim Sexy Chinese Kelly, Young CBC Rachel
  44. NewOriental:
    TUESDAY at NEW ORIENTAL SPA: HAPPY, TIANA & VIVIAN. 10 East Wilmot St, Unit 26, Richmond Hill, on ☎️ 647-381-2688 ☎️ HAPPY is a slim Korean lady with great massage skills & lots of extra fun. TIANA is a sexy Jamaican girl, 5’6” & 120Lbs, possessing 36DD-28-39 assets to drive you crazy. VIVIAN is a pretty and very sexy Chinese doll, standing 5’7” tall, with a slim figure.
  45. SunriseRH:
    TUESDAY at SUNRISE SPA: MICHELLE & SUMMER. 10 East Wilmot St, Unit 27, Richmond Hill, on☎️ 647-325-8086 ☎️ MICHELLE is a young, curvaceous beauty, 5’2” & 130Lbs, 37DDD-31-41, a trim waist, and a nice butt. Come and be pampered. SUMMER is a sweet Asian babe, 5’3” with a captivating 36D-28-39 figure, weighing 108 Lbs. Summer has very good massage & services.
  46. GoldenFlower:
    TUESDAY at 💛⭐🌟🌻GOLDEN FLOWER SPA🌻🌟⭐💛, 8380 Kennedy Rd, Unit C6 (Kennedy & Hwy 7), Markham, ON 905-258-0777: Jojo, Linda & Molly. After 9pm: Sonia Jojo is a beautiful young fair skinned Hong Kong girl who can melt all your cares away. Linda is a pretty Vietnamese cutie with nice melons, curvy ass, and great services. Molly is a petite young Asian sweetheart
  47. ASPA:
    TUESDAY at 𝐀 𝐒𝐏𝐀: Cherry & best massage Rachel 🅰️𝐀 𝐒𝐏𝐀🅰️, 28 South Unionville Ave, Unit 5, Markham. 🅰️𝗖𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝟲𝟰𝟳-𝟳𝟮𝟵-𝟲𝟲𝟬𝟲 𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝟲𝟰𝟳-𝟴𝟯𝟵-𝟱𝟵𝟲𝟲🅰️ CHERRY is a Vietnamese beauty, standing 1.62Cm tall & weighing 50Kg, with a nice 32C bust size. She is a sexy and charming lady with excellent service. RACHEL is a slim and attractive attendant
  48. HolidaySpa:
    Tuesday at 🌴😎🌅𝓗𝓸𝓵𝓲𝓭𝓪𝔂 𝓢𝓹𝓪🌅😎🌴3517 Kennedy Rd, Unit 4, Scarborough ☎️𝟰𝟯𝟳-𝟮𝟰𝟳-𝟭𝟭𝟵𝟵☎️: Eva & Helen. Eva is young, slim, innocent & demure looks, but don’t let her innocent looks deceive. She can massage & service very well. Helen is a sweet and very lovable Asian beauty with just enough curves to tease you, and an attitude to please you.
  49. ForeverWarden:
    Tuesday at 🫦❤️🔴🟥♾️𝓕𝓞𝓡𝓔𝓥𝓔𝓡 𝓢𝓟𝓐♾️🟥🔴❤️🫦 2190 Warden Ave, Unit 201, Scarborough 𝟰𝟭𝟲-𝟴𝟬𝟬-𝟳𝟴𝟴𝟳: Cindy, Tracy & Vivian. Cindy is a slim beauty, 5’4”, natural C Cups & wonderfully long nipples. Her massage is nice, her bbbj will drive you wild & her cfs finish is a dream come true. Tracy is an incredibly cute & pretty Japanese/Taiwanese mixed spinner, about 5’1” and 100 lbs. She is very popular
  50. Annie Spa:
    🎉🍒ANNIE SPA🎉🍒 ✅7-1001 SANDHURST CIRCLE✅ 👌SCARBOROUGH ON M1V 1Z6👌 ☎️(437) 818-8896☎️ ☎️(416) 291-8879☎️ (FINCH & MCCOWAN) OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY 🔥✅NEW MANAGEMENT💯NEW GIRLS🔥🔥 🔥GORGEOUS NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS - TODAY’s ROSTER INCLUDES: 🔥 Angel 💕 Very beautiful girl from Taiwan, very curvy, young and sexy, she can provide a great massage and wonderful touch and super service. Angel is so sexy, especially her 34C breasts, which will make you drool and fall in love!
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