Just like I do but you can make it even more authentic by...
1. give the dog a rough haircut and teach it to bark at you when you come home late to resemble the evil soi ma (lane dogs)
2. Turn up the heating to FULL and walk around the house in a wet towel
3. Give the missus a new pet name like Tum or But (these 2 are usually appropriate and easily remembered for most Falang wives)
4. Give the misus a new long black wig and tell her she looks great in it and stop wearing your glasses...
5. Start getting up at 1pm and always go out for breakfast
6.Start wearing ...
Bugger it , Sishow this is worth a new thread, please add your input to it..