The confused client and her hard-headed doctor

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Thegustaffa

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I have been seeing this lady as a client of mine for about three months now. She was referred to me from another massage therapist, who worked on her for several months before me.

As I work on my client, I always feel these large masses on her thighs right above the back of her knees. I also feel these masses in her upper arms and on the front of her lower legs, but those areas are not as large. When I discussed these problems with the other massage therapist, she ventured to think that the client had fibromyalgia, which was a concern in the back of my mind as well.

Eventually I coaxed the client to get tested for fibromyalgia, but her doctor brushes her requests off like she doesn't know what she's talking about. And to make matters worse, the client's own daughter, who is half her age, was just diagnosed with fibromyalgia last year!!! My client also suffers from arthritis really bad in her knees and shoulders and has vericose veins in her legs which prevents me from doing most deep-tissue work. But the client isn't satisified with the massage unless she feels pain; in her mind, she has to feel pain in order to be relieved of her stresses.

I am at a complete and total loss as to how to help this woman, especially if her doctor won't confirm our belief. Do any of you have any suggestions as to what I could do to make her massage a more beneficial and enjoyable one? Any suggestions would be irrefutably appreciated. :?
 


My only thought is she needs to see a new doctor. Any doctor who does not listen to his patient is almost worthless as a physician. I know insurance can make it difficult, but it can be done. No harm would be done by testing her for fibro, so there is no reason for refusing to confirm or rule it out.
 


My sentiments exactly! But how do you tastefully suggest to someone that they should seek an entirely different doctor? I brought the idea of seeking a second opinion up, but she's content with her doctor's diagnosis.

***THE MOST DIFFICULT CLIENT IN THE WORLD***!!!!!!!! Makes you just wanna SHAKE something!!!!
(And I say that with love) :D
 


Well, that certainly makes it more difficult!! I guess there isn't much you can do. I think I would concentrate on relaxation massage, explaining all the health benefits and how simply reducing stress and increasing circulation can have a huge positive effect on her overall health. Improving the overall health has no drawbacks.
 


I'm with Sharon. Unfortunately, if this client wants to live in pain without so much as a second opinion, that's her choice :( It's hard for us to watch clients in pain that simply won't do anything about it that you KNOW could help, but whaddaya do besides helping her relax and giving her the best care you can. You can lead a horse to water, etc.

But, on another note, a VERY qualified and knowledgeable massage instructor of ours told us that often, Fibromyalgia is what she called a "wastebasket diagnosis". In other words, "we can't find what's wrong with you but we're going to slap an impressive-sounding label on your symptoms." Often, this instructor said, the real cause is trigger points. She mentioned that in a fibromyalgia test, they test a set number of benchmark areas to see which ones are painful and if over a certain number of them are, poof: you have fibromyalgia. Never mind that this person may have been in a car wreck or be on some drug that screws with the neurological/musculoskeletal system(s) and that the patient might be in pain from THAT and it MAY have nothing to do with actual fibromyalgia, which, I believe, STILL hasn't been nailed down to any particular cause yet. It's what most other conditions are in the medical world: forget the cause, create a list of symptoms that we can drug and bill for (at least that's true for some).

Anyway, good luck with your client, and hopefully someday she will "see the light" :)

Peace,
~Jyoti
 


I'm so discouraged, I almost want to stop seeing her as a client. :( I hate not being to help people, but I know I can't help everybody. I kinda want her to have fibromyalgia, just so I can say "I told you so", so she could say "Yes, you were right" and sue her doctor. :twisted:
 
The confused client and her hard-headed doctor

BluHairedFaerie said:
the client's own daughter, who is half her age, was just diagnosed with fibromyalgia last year!!!
Maybe suggest she sees her daughter's doctor? If the daughter is seeing the same doctor, not sure what you could suggest.


I'm thinking cold stones (with hot stones to keep the body warm). The alternating temps will do great things. She probably won't like the temp, the no pain no gain attitude might be good here :)

Aromatherapy http://www.holistic-online.com/remedies/cfs/fib_aromatherapy.htm Only use the junpier if there are no kidney isses and only use the rosemary if there are no blood pressure issues. If there are no liver issues, I'd include carrot seed oil. If her liver is not good, it will make her feel like she has a hangover the next morning, it can stimulate quite a liver detox. With her no pain no gain attitude, she might like feeling rotten the next day.
 


You know, she actually likes the heat therapies I give her, she says it works wonders for her arthritic knees. Maybe I should just run her a hot bath and charge her... :lol:
 


I brought the idea of seeking a second opinion up, but she's content with her doctor's diagnosis.

I hate not being to help people, but I know I can't help everybody. I kinda want her to have fibromyalgia, just so I can say "I told you so", so she could say "Yes, you were right" and sue her doctor.

My thoughts for what they are worth:

She's content. If she's content, then why push so hard? Let her know that you will do the best with what you have to work with, and it may be that she only gets temporary relief. Suggest a second opinion, if she asks, and then just work as normal. Don't promise anything to her except that if she is not getting relief from your methods, that may be the reason to move on or consider that already mentioned second opinion.

As for "suing". I am not a proponent of even thinking this way.

Just do your best, make the proper suggestions and work with what you have. I have a client right now who is going through the same sort of thing. She has seen other docs she's been referred to and doesn't like the dx of her primary - but continues to go back and do what the primary says. Then she comes to me and continues to be in pain. I can only suggest so much. In the end it is up to that individual if they want to seek other options.

Good luck. I am sure you are helping her in some way and once you are comfortable with doing what you can, without the expectation of "fixing" this lady, I figure you'll be at peace with working on her.

:)

PS:
Fibromyalgia is what she called a "wastebasket diagnosis". In other words, "we can't find what's wrong with you but we're going to slap an impressive-sounding label on your symptoms."
Agreed!
 


I would also suggest she see a different therapist. If she's dead set on the pain factor when it comes to the massage, and you're not comfortable doing it..then simply don't.

I have no problem telling a client that needs to find a different therapist to do so. If i can't give you what you want and need, then by all means, find someone else who can.



Are these spots you speak of painful? Is she overweight? Could they possibly just be isolated lumps of adipose tissue?
 


But the client isn't satisified with the massage unless she feels pain; in her mind, she has to feel pain in order to be relieved of her stresses.

I missed this comment.

Are you saying she needs to feel pain everywhere you touch... or she just likes very deep pressure... and wants to "feel it" in certain areas? For instance, could you go deep in her back and make her happy?

This was a good thread with a lot of input relating to "pain and massage" -
Should a massage hurt?
 


Texas-gal wrote:
Are you saying she needs to feel pain everywhere you touch... or she just likes very deep pressure... and wants to "feel it" in certain areas? For instance, could you go deep in her back and make her happy?

No...There is a marked difference between her interpretation of "good firm pressure" and "pain". She likes pressure so deep I'm sure it hurts her at times...She'll just mumble some expletive in her native language like it's all good. I've explained to her on several differemt occassions that good massage DOES NOT equal painful massage, but I may as well be driving a Hummer over her body and I'm sure she'd like it. :twisted:


Spacer wrote:
Are these spots you speak of painful? Is she overweight? Could they possibly just be isolated lumps of adipose tissue?

The spots are painful and hard to the touch, like someone put their hand under her skin...If it is fat, it's hard as H-E-double hockeysticks. She is overweight, but excersizes frequently and eats well. I know she doesn't drink enough water though. I sometimes wonder in the back of my head if she really does exercize and do the homework I ask her to do.

I'm really getting frustrated with this client. I think I'll just continue treating her like normal and try to find someone else, preferably a 300-pound man, to work and twirk her just right.

To IMI ppl: I made an appointment with Irene for her to see this client. I figure if she can't help her, NO ONE CAN! :P Plus we all know what a masochist Irene is... :wink:
 


RE: IMI people: Smart move there kid! I'll be curious to hear how it goes with her! IM me and let me know when! :wink:
 


The appointment is in two weeks. It would have been today, but she had to cancel. I actually got her on the phone last night with Irene to reschedule because she was giving me such a hard time...When Irene got on the phone, she recoiled like a scared kitty! :twisted: Maaaan, I can't *wait* for this appointment! It's going DOWN!!! :lol:
 


She's an elder Finnish lady who is proud of her craft (and with every right) who has been practicing since she was a poor farm girl of 1930's Finland...Who now has made quite a requtation for herself...Check out her webiste.

But man, I feel for her first-time visitors. I'm sure they leave feeling dazed and confused, but somehow happier... :lol: :P
 


I'm getting very confused with the obviously off board discussion comments....

Anyway, Irene sounds like a perfect fit for your client.
 


melb said:
I'm getting very confused with the obviously off board discussion comments....

Anyway, Irene sounds like a perfect fit for your client.

Agreed.

The only thing I am a bit concerned about is that you seem to want "Irene" to "hurt" the client.
she recoiled like a scared kitty! Maaaan, I can't *wait* for this appointment! It's going DOWN!!!
I am not quite following... but I hope it all goes according to plan.
 
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  31. Sparkling Spa:
    โšก๏ธ๐ŸŒŸSPARKLING SPAโšก๏ธ๐ŸŒŸ โœ…50 Lockridge Ave Unit 8โœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒMarkham, ON L3R 8X4๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ (905) 604-8186 Spa Land Lineโ˜Ž๏ธ โ˜Ž๏ธ (437) 446-6688 NEW Spa Cell Phoneโ˜Ž๏ธ (West of Warden & 16th Ave) OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY ๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…NEW MANAGEMENT๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS๐Ÿ”ฅSUPERSTAR SERVICE QUEENS AVAILABLE AT SPARKLING SPA FOR ALL YOUR MASSAGE AND SPECIAL EXTRA NEEDS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ”ฅโค๏ธ๐Ÿ‘Œ ๐Ÿ”ฅSEXY NEW YOUNG GIRLS ALWAYS WORKING - Todayโ€™s Schedule isโ€ฆ๐Ÿ”ฅ Zoe - ๐Ÿ”ฅStunning Tall Taiwanese Service Queen with Endless Passion and Sensuality w
  32. Moneylee:
    All season wellness center : Young girl big boobs beautiful face deep massage Midi,Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament Lala,Young girl big boobs beautiful face deep massage Helen , Young beautiful face sexy body and good deep massage Maggie , Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Sherry,๐Ÿ  address: #5-30 Rambler dr Brampton ,Ontario L6W 1E2โ˜Ž๏ธ4376655510 ๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿˆต๏ธ๐Ÿˆต๏ธ๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ‘…
  33. Moneylee:
    Full season wellness center: young girl pretty face nice figure Thai deep massage Anika , Student pretty face nice figure Thai deep massage Michelle,Young girl Big breasted saucy naughty Ella, Taiwan girl DD Boobs Thai deep massage lily,Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Mary. 2560 Shepard ave Mississauga unit 1 .โ˜Ž๏ธ4379857899๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿˆต๏ธ๐Ÿˆต๏ธ๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ‘…
  34. Jennyโ€™s Spa:
    ๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’JENNYโ€™S SPA๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ โœ…5170 DUNDAS STREET WESTโœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒETOBICOKE ONTARIO M9A 1C4๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ( 647-893-5196)โ˜Ž๏ธCall or Text โ˜Ž๏ธ( 437-888-3759)โ˜Ž๏ธCall Only (ETOBICOKE) OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY ๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…GRAND OPENING๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS EVERYDAY๐Ÿ”ฅEXCELLENT MASSAGE + SERVICE QUEENS NOW AVAILABLE AT JENNYโ€™S SPA FOR ALL YOUR MASSAGE AND SPECIAL EXTRA NEEDS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ”ฅโค๏ธ๐Ÿ‘Œ ๐Ÿ”ฅTWO BEAUTIFUL NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS EVERYDAY๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿ’ฏREAL PICTURES OF ATTENDANTS๐Ÿ’ฏ ๐Ÿ”ฅTODAYโ€™s ROSTER INCLUDES: Jenny๐Ÿ˜˜ - An exotic tall and slim Vietn
  35. wonderspa:
    ๐ŸŒบ๐ŸŒบOpen Sunday Wonder spa(9421Jane st unit127)โ˜Ž๏ธ416-5000-800.very big boost Joey and Sunny working today,Joey is sexy girl ,she can provide very good massage with sensual touch, nice Sunny can provide deep tissue massage,she got a lot experience,come see them today,welcome to walk in๐ŸŒบ๐Ÿ‘™much try๐Ÿท๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ
  36. AliceSpa:
    SUNDAY at ๐—”๐—Ÿ๐—œ๐—–๐—˜ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”, 4915 Steeles Ave. E, Scarborough ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿฒ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿต๐Ÿด-๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿด๐Ÿต๐Ÿด:[/color] Hot Busty BLONDE Girl today at Alice Spa: ELLA (12pm-9pm): is a small & curvy white young girl from Romania, super super busty EE Cups, blue eyes, blond hair, ok services, bbbJ cfs. Please call before booking her due to high demand. Alice Spa has DEBIT PAYMENT available now! Plenty of free parking. Front and back entrance. ALICE SPA, 4915 Steeles Ave. E,
  37. xodyhard:
    Anyone know tracy from forever spa,does anyone where she working aside in forever spa?
  38. Golden Sunshine Spa:
    โœจClick on our Username and FOLLOW US for updates and special services ! โœ… Today๐ŸŒธYoYo๐ŸŒธBrandy๐ŸŒธLynda๐ŸŒธHellen Call us โ˜Ž 905 - 265 - 2158โ˜Ž๏ธ Your ultimate service awaits! โœจ
  39. ASPA:
    ๐—ฆ๐—จ๐—ก๐——๐—”๐—ฌ ๐—”๐—ง ๐—” ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”: EMMA and Best Massage RACHEL.[/color] ๐Ÿ…ฐ๏ธ๐€ ๐’๐๐€๐Ÿ…ฐ๏ธ, 28 South Unionville Ave, Unit 5, Markham. ๐Ÿ…ฐ๏ธ๐—–๐—ฎ๐—น๐—น ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿณ๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿต-๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿฒ ๐—ผ๐—ฟ ๐˜๐—ฒ๐˜…๐˜ ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿด๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿต-๐Ÿฑ๐Ÿต๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿ…ฐ๏ธ EMMA is 1.64Cm. and weighs 52Kg. Emma is sweet and elegant, has very good communication & massage, and her services will make your visit enjoyable. RACHEL is a slim and attractive
  40. ForeverWarden:
    Sunday at ๐Ÿซฆโค๏ธ๐Ÿ”ด๐ŸŸฅโ™พ๏ธ๐“•๐“ž๐“ก๐“”๐“ฅ๐“”๐“ก ๐“ข๐“Ÿ๐“โ™พ๏ธ๐ŸŸฅ๐Ÿ”ดโค๏ธ๐Ÿซฆ2190 Warden Ave, Unit 201, Scarborough ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿฒ-๐Ÿด๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿฌ-๐Ÿณ๐Ÿด๐Ÿด๐Ÿณ: Jennifer & Mia. Jennifer is a tall, slim & pretty Asian babe with natural melons and eraser nipples. She is very open minded. Come and give her a try, and youโ€™ll be sure to come back for more. Mia is a Caribbean service queen temptress with incredible curves & very friendly attitude. She is able to bbbj
  41. HolidaySpa:
    Sunday at ๐ŸŒด๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒ…๐“—๐“ธ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ญ๐“ช๐”‚ ๐“ข๐“น๐“ช๐ŸŒ…๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒด3517 Kennedy Rd, Unit 4, Scarborough โ˜Ž๏ธ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿญ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿต๐Ÿตโ˜Ž๏ธAmy & Suki. AMY is an attractive young lady with larger breasts and a nice bottom. She has outstanding oral skills, and is very popular. Donโ€™t miss out on her special skills SUKI is a sexy lady, short with big boobs, medium massage & nice services. ๐ŸŒด๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒ…HOLIDAY SPA๐ŸŒ…๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒด
  42. Soul Relax Spa:
    โœจ Looking for a relaxing escape? โœ… Meet๐ŸŒธRebecca๐ŸŒธTiffanyCall us today for the best treatment and service experience. Click on our Username and FOLLOW US for updates ! Call now โ˜Ž 289 - 298 - 5662โ˜Ž๏ธ Your ultimate relaxation awaits! โœจ
  43. Lulu1980:
    Phoenix blossom Spa โ™จ๏ธโ™จ๏ธโ™จ๏ธtable shower ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘body scrub๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน5124 Dundas W Etobicoke โ˜Ž๏ธ416-817-3366 Nice girl Luna is joining. She can provide a very good massage with sensual touch. She knows how to take direction and please a man. Jessica ๐Ÿ˜˜can provide deep Thai massage. She takes directions very well. She has many assets and knows how to use them. Come see her today.Welcome to walk in or make an appointment at any time. Plenty of parking space at the back door
  44. Red Rose Spa:
    ๐ŸŒธ We have 13 hot brown girls today ๐ŸŒธ ASHA, MALIYA, PREET, KIRAN, ANNA, NISHA, SALMA, SABHA ๐ŸŒธ 2588 Birchmount ๐ŸŒธ 2 Invergordon ๐ŸŒธ 647-702-8800 ๐ŸŒธ Please visit for a great erotic massage
  45. Applover:
    This chat is something. So no one believes Markkk
  46. Applover:
    This chat is something
  47. SugarLoveSpa:
    Sunday at โค๏ธ๐Ÿ’™ ๐Ÿ’œโŽ๐—ฆ๐—จ๐—š๐—”๐—ฅ ๐—Ÿ๐—ข๐—ฉ๐—˜ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”โŽ ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ’˜: ANA, CARA & JOLIE. 1270 Finch Ave W (at Keele St), Unit 18. North York, ANA is a young, short and sweet lady, 5โ€™1 & 105 Lbs, very tight, with a small to medium booty. Ana is a versatile honey who provides great massage, & can accommodate your needs. CARA is a young & attractive Chinese attendant, 5โ€™3โ€ & 100 pounds with natural C Cup big boobs, very friendly
  48. Annie Spa:
    ๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ANNIE SPA๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ โœ…7-1001 SANDHURST CIRCLEโœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒSCARBOROUGH ON M1V 1Z6๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ (647) 891-9688โ˜Ž๏ธ โ˜Ž๏ธ (416) 291-8879โ˜Ž๏ธ (FINCH & MCCOWAN) OPEN 9:30am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY ๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…NEW MANAGEMENT๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿ”ฅGORGEOUS NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS - TODAYโ€™s ROSTER INCLUDES: ๐Ÿ”ฅ Helen๐ŸฅฐBrand new very young university student from Hong Kong. Great massage skills with a wild flirtatious side willing to tease and please to bring you to satisfaction. Perky natural 34C breasts perfect for kissing and body slide
  49. hiyamickey:
    Reinella wellness will have 6 girls working, young petite Japanese girl Amanda, Queenie, Lucky, Jenny, Vanessa, Ella @6262 hwy7 unit #1 Vaughan โ˜Ž๏ธ๏ผš905-851-4888
  50. SugarLoveSpa:
    Monday at โค๏ธ๐Ÿ’™ ๐Ÿ’œโŽ๐—ฆ๐—จ๐—š๐—”๐—ฅ ๐—Ÿ๐—ข๐—ฉ๐—˜ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”โŽ ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ’˜: ELLA & TIFFANY. 1270 Finch Ave W (at Keele St), Unit 18. North York, ON โ˜Ž ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฑ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿด๐Ÿด โ˜Ž ELLA is a lovely Thai sweetheart, 5โ€™1โ€ with C Cups, smooth skin and a very pleasing attitude. TIFFANY is an amazing slim petite doll with natural 34C melons, slim waist, & a cute little 33โ€ booty. Tiffany has incredible bbbj skills, tastes as sweet as honey