In my own experiences on this topic, found it boils down to several things:
- Paid or unpaid.
- Mental health & stability.
- Realistic expectations.
- Someone better or shift in personal life
With the girls seen over years, as mentioned in the threads, you do develop a connection and rapport, usually leading to heightened experiences in services offered, outside the spa interactions, and ongoing communication.
The line for me that is crossed that shows whether it's of substance, is when you pay or not. You'll pay for the room fee, but aren't tipping for what happens in room. You might think that's bullshit! but have seen several girls where no money is exchanged in room. How does this happen? One day, the girl says, I can't charge you anymore, or says your money's no good here, or places the money back into your pants. A line's been crossed, and she knows you aren't just a customer.
Some aren't in the best mental health, or stable. At the worst have experienced girls who are most likely bipolar. When they're manic, you can have some of the best experiences you've ever had at a spa in every which way. When they're depressed, you can see and experience vindictive, jealous, immature, and risky behaviour.
I've had one have realistic expectations. We obviously met at a spa. Given that context, we are both often seeing other people. Why would we be exclusive? She's seeing dozens of guys a week. She has a preference for her to take care of my needs more often, or exclusively. But knows that variety is the spice. She'll up her game, and soon, you're enjoying things with her that you don't with others.
In moving on, from her ending things for a myriad of reasons, or things have changed in your own circumstances, at times finding someone younger and hotter. Clearly nothing lasts forever, and what you experienced when the curtain temporarily opened, is a good memory.
As time passes, circumstances can also change where you connect again. When that's happened in the past, it's either cold and professional, or like putting on an old comfortable pair of shoes. Often that re-connection has happened as a walk-in to a spa, and discovering she's there.