Thais only live for the day

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to me it was obvious from the story that she was never ever going to commit to that guy - so really what does it matter, 10k or not - it was never going to go anywhere she was just stringing him on for the ride and getting as much money out of him at the time as she could. it sounded like it was rather trivial for her to continue to spend time cultivating him to get more money, so made a flat out demand for money so if the fish bit.. then its all good, if not, then oh well no problem as there was 0 future in that particular relationship anyway from her point of view. she had you there at that time and she could have various others after that if she wanted, so money would be coming in anyway and she obviously had no interest in going home. so i dont think shes that stupid shes just doing what she wants to do,

on another issue, me and my mrs were in a gogo in nana yesterday night - there were some real stunners in there and it was quite busy being saturday and all, so there were all sorts - young japanese trendy kids to the really older guys. there was this one guy who looked his mid 70, very overweight and in fact seemed like he had recently recovered from a stroke judging by his attempts to bop to the music and cull the hotties on seforum.xxxe. about 3 of the girls who were in his direction were grabbing hold of each other laughing and pretending to push each other off seforum.xxxe in his direction, joking that one of them should go sit/go with him. none of them did. but later on in the night my mrs shook me laughing and said look look (pointing), the guy was very slowly walking out of the place (holding onto chairs so he didn’t fall over) with a crooked smile on his sweaty face, and had pulled himself quite the hottie. all the girls on seforum.xxxe were laughing and putting their hands over their mouths in disbelief that one of their mates could possibly go with him. i said to my mrs my god 555555 what the hell is she gonna do with him, he looks like he's about to die! look at her mates laughing, does she have no self pride/worth? my mrs said so what, for money. i said yeah but surely there has to be a point where money can only go so far... she said yea but for money, if he say to her he give 10 thousand then maybe she has to think about that. i didnt know what to say to that, other than if someone was to offer me 10k, 20k, or 10 grand english pound to fuk an old woman of the same id say no fukin way, you'd have nightmares for the rest of your life! its not worth it. then she made it clear that i had no idea what it was like to have 'no money', so that id never be able to understand... either way, this girl was pretty good lookin so theres no doubt there wouldnt be other customers if she didnt go with this guy, but i dont know. some girls obviously will do what they want to do for X amount of money, and others like her mates you’re your mate, wont. So I wouldn’t say her mates are stupid if he offered them 10k or 20k or 1k to go with them and they refused, just like your friend breaking off with the black guy for the 10k incident I wouldn’t say is stupid. Just doin what they wanna do

 

[rhea]

555555 Yep, that's about the size of it!

Anyway, I guess I just 'live for the day' now since I retired. Just waking up is a bonus IMHO! es:

 

[Psychodelic Chicken]

Good post IMHO and I wish that last paragraph applied to the UK instead of the usual scumbags holding thier lazy hands out and having the Government slap twenty pound notes in it.............erm......innit!

 

[Cal0130]

This is known as a 'small brown lie' I believe as appose to a big white lie eh Denpah ........555555555555555555

 

[Sindhu]

Good statement the last sentence from your post actually ...

(i would just exclude customer service or guest friendly experiences for many Hotels, which are great in LOS imo)

 

[tenny_the_true_gaian]

The longer I live here the more I learn.

I arrived thinking the clever oriental, sorry if that sounds racist but I imagined them to be devilishly clever at business and dealings, this has certainly been my experience to date of the Chinese but not the Thai. Then I thought the Thai were just street smart, uneducated but everyday smart, this has proven incorrect. Then I went through a period of thinking them very lazy and due to poor standards of education thick, I ranted on about how stupid this was and how stupid that was, example, key money, how daft just trying to trick me regarding the true cost of the rent, I was wrong, there is a very sensible reason for key money and it has nothing to do with greed.

Living in the nano second, I totally agree they do, they will react to a situation and not consider the longer term consequences and even when pointed out to them, they will still continue with the initial action, however personally detrimental. Maybe Buddha will sort them out if they are lucky. Is that due to a lack of intelligence? lack of common sense? lack of rational thinking?

How does one judge common sense, if not by their own standards? its not a culture thing, that ones lost me a bit, how can they have common sense but in an asian way? surely common sense is common sense, isn't it?

Marc26 comment regarding the warmth of experiences here, totally agree with, the smile may only be skin deep on many occasions, they smile and at the same time speak bad about us but generally I like the feel of this warmth, still not fully figured the true feeling and the false one, but getting better at it, just takes time.

 

[Sandralynn]

This has wandered off the original thread, however some very interesting reading and I would like to add my 10 penneth worth.

As for consequence, there is no consequence, or understanding of consequence in Thai society as was rightly pointed out earlier on in the piece. You see it everywhere and a couple of examples close to home would be where my lady's relatives live in a wooden shack on stilts near Phitsanoluk. They throw the rubbish and just about everything else under the house for convenience, then wonder why the smells and mosquitoes permeate up through the holes in the wooden floor.

Of course there are the obvious examples with three or four people on motorbikes with no crash helmets, very often riding on your side of the road and many others too numerous to mention. One which has plagued me of late is the fact that whenever I look at the electrical wiring in a house here, it is all over the place, some are earthed properly, others are not at all, and sometimes they are in between. As many as five different coloured wires are used, and often inter changed so that you really don't know what is being wired to what. And the good old electric heater in the shower which has in very large letters, "THIS PRODUCT MUST BE EARTHED", usually doesn't have one.

The point I am trying to make here is that the consequence of these actions can be deadly, and indeed I have received a couple of nasty belts over the past month from live electrical appliances.

Consequence blind I think was the expression used and it seems to fit the bill.

Some of it stems from the fact that as children they are never taught to question the teacher as to the meaning of what is being said, or even if it is correct. So they do not question and seek answers/reasons/consequences.

On the subject of bargirls etc which was also dealt with in this thread, I believe it is simply a case that if the girls have decided to sacrifice their bodies for money, then they work in the bar for is much money as they can get. So if a farang offers them a load of money, they will take it whilst he is here (even if they refer to him as a pig), and as soon as he is out of sight they will go back to earn more, hoping that he will continue sending them money.

The thought of stopping work because one is being sent money from overseas is an absolute no-no, because they have already decided to sacrifice their bodies for money, and this is a great way to earn more. This is what they have decided to do and this is what they do. They are consequence blind in this way as well, mainly because of the inherent trait they have, but also because of their desire to earn more money.

True there will be some who will leave the bar scene and live happily ever after with a farang, and as the old saying goes I don't believe you can ever take the bar out of the girl. I have seen this on a number of occasions when farangs who have moved up north with their girls, bring them back down to Patong to visit old bar owners, only to find these now reasonably unattractive girls deciding to join in with the pole dancing, dancing on the bars and generally thrusting their asses into strangers crotches -- -- generally making a fool of themselves, and embarrassing their husbands into the bargain.

Another item which was discussed on the thread was with regard to the support that the families get through living up country. While that is true to a certain extent, it is not always as rosy as the picture seems. Furthermore country life is not just a simple "produce crops and feed the family" happy scenario, many of the poor farmers are in debt to the banks, to the co-operative owners, loan sharks etc etc, and will never make a buck/baht as long as their arses point downwards. So much for the idyllic country lifestyle.

I won't go on any longer as this would become a novel -- -- however I do have a theory on learned behaviours becoming genetic traits, and some of this could well explain why some races are poor at some things!!

 

[Dorinta]

I would think this is just a generalization in the area you deal with. The same logic applies in everyone's home country. It's only more visibly apparent now that recession is in full swing and everyone is just out to get the buck.

That's just how I see it. It's like bars back home in Texas. One goes up, you develop a good relationship with them but in another 6 months, they switch management just like that and it's back to just earning your buck.

 

[Zortrox]

depends who you wake up next to IMHO .....555555555555

 

[Hockey Girl]

why is she an idiot?
because she didnt want to attach herself to a stranger that she was probably not attracted to?
how does that make her an idiot?

 

[richardinunion]

Thanks mark26 and sorry i got it wrong geespot

Originally Posted by marc26
my whole point was they just don't understand that there is just as bad situations in the west

Yeah, the grass certainly looks greener in the west I am sure and thais generally have no real idea of the problems that go with it.
Absolutely no doubt you can live cheaper in the village for a while and that underscores the living in the moment mindset.

In terms of living in the moment there are a lot of westerners who have been doing just that for quite some time, because all the false information they have been fed. Instead of going to the village, they go to the bank or the credit card.:

If too many do that for too long there are problems I think.

 

[Kendra]

this is a true story

2 years back in bangkok i helped a local thai made $70million baht in 10 months time but in month 11 a friend of his introduced him online casino gambling (the one with the webcam). he got hooked at it & he lost all the 70mil in less than a month. now he's back to his village in chantaburi doing nothing. he calls me sometimes telling me his luck has changed & he can beat the casino now...

till now i am still trying to figure out how his brain operates..

 

[Have Compassion]

Take a look at the thread "why Thai women do what they do" in the thai culture and relationships listed a link to youtube series of videos showing bar girls/thai women with farangs etc and telling all about there lifes and why they do what they do....answers a lot of questions.

I now honestly believe that my girl is part of a big industry that is there to make a s much money as they can and if they get the chance to marry a foreigner then great but it will have to be a good one and not just a chap who has seen her a few days but if the fool offers take his monthly money and carry on she who earns the most wins i suppose...take a look at the clips on the thread TY to THAILAND listed by THAIFARANG on Youtube it does answer a lot IMHO......boy i wish i spent a year on this forum before my first trip but my knowledge is growing day by day and I think we all make the same mistakes at frst and eventually all wise up....I hope

 

[I hate Peugeot]

I decided a little while ago that this trait is actually a good thing - a good thing for us farangs when dealing with Thais in the forms of BG and TG.

The BG is able to make us feel that she truly does feel something for us - that cherished GF experience that makes P4P in Thailand something special - because by paying her a couple of thousand baht we have solved all her problems for as far into the future as she can see - the stars in her eyes are the same ones that could only be bought in the west for a million bucks, a fur coat and a mansion.

And in dealing with TG (BG,GG etc) this same inability to consider the future enables an under 30 year old TG to accept an over 50 year old farang as a life partner - if the age gap is not a problem today then its not a problem at all - QED (whereas a farang girl would be doing the math - when I am x he will be y the heck did I marry him etc!) h:

 

[LgTuttle]

'Thais don't have the awareness of the wider world that westerners have and don't see the bigger picture and how actions impact on other things '

one more generation and the thais will be up to speed on the wider world for sure, it's more a question of will they contribute to screwing up the world as fast as us westerners having got that knowledge

 

[lola1234]

I've always found that in the land of the blind the one eyed man is ridiculed, I think that this is a better analogy for society.

 

[one shot]

Again I gain more knowledge from you guys....which is priceless.

A chap who will remain nameless on his first and second trip spent thousands on a TG who was the one, considered buying her a condo to live in and giving her what she wanted a month (50k) he took her to all the best restaurants and bought her designer clothes ....because he was an idiot and wanted the same back from the girl which he thought he had.

On his last day he left the hotel and his tg was chatting with a young Thai lad who cleaned the rooms and a few words were remembered as his tg referred to him as "moo" which the Thai boy looked shocked at. They went to the airport and the fool even paid for a limo to take her home to her village as she was afraid to fly , handed over another wedge of cash and assumed that TG was home safe in the village but the word "moo" bothered our friend and eventually found out that his darling was calling him a pig and had gone directly to the bar and was bar fined twice that weekend for 2k a time....my point is they (Thai girls) have no common sense IMHO a girl who was given everything and handed the chance to leave the bar scene threw it away for a few thousand baht and showed total disrespect by referring to him as a pig to a guy who cleaned rooms.!! She would have had everything but threw it away for some extra baht which was a small amount to what our friend had given her.

Reading your comments has helped me understand the Thai way of thinking and it may be US westerners who need to rethink our thought patters and expectations...the going back to the bar was a shock but being called a MOO :meuh: was the real shock for me ...err i mean my mate 555555

 

[Tainted Love]

So shes screwing a guy who she doesn't like and thinks is a pig, he pays her loads of money and as soon as hes gone she screwing other people for more money. Makes perfect sense to me, shes good at her job...

 

[Pompal 09.]

Well, I must say I was a bit over the top to call her an idiot! But the point being, if she had good sense, then she would do the math and see that getting paid 50K to do nothing, or get a real job, be respectable, and get 50K plus salary doing the real job(non-BG job) is a much better lot in life than getting drunk and screwed by strangers most nights, and probably netting less than 50K at the end of the month for that, probably much less after subtracting typical BG expenses in the P4P scene.

Yet, I must admit that there is a certain strange logic in their way of thinking, if you sit and talk to one of these girls and listen to her explain it as she sees it. It is the three BFs is better than one logic. Not so much because of triple sponsor money, which is also a major plus, but because then there is 3 times as much chance that one of them will actually marry them some day.

But they don't see any connection between their actions by lying and staying in the P4P scene, while they are accepting sponsor money, and losing the sponsor money when they are found out. If you told them, maybe their BF will found out they are lying, and they will lose their big free monthly income, they would simply say that maybe he won't find out. They don't see how their actions have anything to do with the outcome. Whether he finds out, and they lose the income or not, they are most likely to just attribute to their luck. If luck is good, he doesn't find out. If luck is bad, he does. No cause and effect at all.

 

[Beetle-[Mania]]

Actually, that was not the case. He was currently Option #2. If the OZ BF couldn't get her a visa first, and things worked out with Walter, then she would go and live in CA with Walter. She liked Walter, and likes CA, where she lived before. We even discussed that it would be nice if she went to CA with him, as we would still be able to get together occasionally.



Not at all. She had been getting 30K every month like clockwork from him. He was only coming for a week to go meet her parents in Isaan, which would be a step towards marriage. The 10K was for the tickets for them to go to Isaan, and she did buy those tickets the day he sent the money, so it was not an attempt to make an extra 10K. If all went well, then he would begin looking into getting her a visa to go to the US. Her plan was to give the Oz guy one more chance to get her a visa, and if he didn't come through, then go to CA with Walter, if he came through first. First come, first serve. She seemed to prefer the Oz guy. I saw his pics and he was a very good-looking bloke, quite fit, and IIRC, 3 yrs younger than Walter, who I did not see a pic of. Each of them was twice her age or more.



That is true, but I made it clear that I was not offering anything beyond a per diem, on account of her having other BFs. Her goal was to marry and leave LOS.


No, but given the fact that lying to BFs meant absolutley nothing to her, she could have not insisted on the RT air ticket to Isaan, which was the tip-off that she was lying to him. It was just not believable that she wanted to fly back to BKK, and then presumably take a bus back to Udon Thani, just to spend 2 more hours with him. All she had to say was, OK, RT for you, one way ticket for me, 7500 Baht, and then he is none the wiser. He had used up all his holiday leave and it would be nearly a year before he could return to LOS. 12 months time 30K equals 360K Baht. But no, she insisted on him buying the RT ticket for her, so she wouldn't have to ride the bus back to Pattaya(or buy herself a ticket for 2K more than a bus ticket). So all for saving 2K, she lost 360K, maybe more.

The only way I could see any rationality at all in her actions is that this is a woman who wants to get her way 100% of the time. The guy who passes the 100% giving her her way test is the one who she will eventually end up with. How many guys could deal with that, and for how long? Which is why I think the fortune teller was right.